Allergies Suck

How much does it suck that after nearly 40 years of springtime allergies, I now find myself suffering with watery, itchy eyes and a sniffly nose in the summertime too? Wasn't that sneeze-inducing pollen-laden range of time between March and May enough? Must I continue to walk around looking like I've just gotten done sobbing over some French film, even when all the trees and flowers and plants have long-since budded? 

Why was this decision made without my consent? Will there be a standard of living pay increase to cover the cost of additional Claritin and Visine AC eye drops?

Please Lord, let my respiratory system love Atlanta as much as it loved Mississippi. My years at Alcorn State University were the most lovely allergy-free I've ever had in my life. 

But apparently, for reasons I cannot fathom, Wisconsin's flora and fauna are conspiring to kill me. This is precisley one of the 142 reasons why I intend to leave this state like a cheating ex-boyfriend.

I'm running like Flo Jo.

I'm gonna make like a tree and leave.

I'm Audi 5000.

Deuces.

Peace.

[Insert whatever "on to greener pastures" cliche you like here]

Until then, could someone please pass me a tissue?

Allergies suck.